How Social Media would’ve reacted to past Manchester derbies

Noisy neighbours, Michael Owen’s last-gasp winner, ‘Why Always Me?’, pre hair-transplant Wayne Rooney striking a pose after scoring THAT goal.

These are just some of the iconic snapshots associated with the Manchester derby in recent years.

But what about those moments that are starting to drift away into the nether regions of our subconscious?

Those cherished flashes that we lived and breathed before the memes and wacky Snapchat filters framed our consumption and understanding of the beautiful game.

More to the point, how would the likes of, say, Shaun Goater, reacted to filling his boots after robbing a hapless Gary Neville?

Or what irreverent piece of prose would Eric Cantona have offered up after inspiring the mother of all Manchester derby comebacks at a baying Maine Road?

Well, it might’ve gone something like this….

Man City 2-3 Man United, 7 November 1993

Fun fact. In their 1993-94 title-winning season Manchester United went top of the table as early as August 23 and remained untouchable for the rest of the campaign.

And not even a first-half brace from City striker Niall Quinn was going to knock them out of their stride.

In fact, it only served to spark the Red Devils into life with Eric Cantona equalling his opposite number’s feat before Roy Keane’s strike snatched all three points.

Here’s what King Eric had to say in the aftermath…

Did you expect anything less?

However, for all his hard work, Quinny was left licking his wounds…

Man United 5-0 Man City, 10 November 1994

Revenge is sweet and even more sugary when it comes against your cross-town adversaries.

United’s 5-1 hammering at the hands of City in 1989 was described by (then plain old) Alex Ferguson as “his most embarrassing defeat”.

That painful memory was erased on a crisp Thursday night at Old Trafford five years later.

Goals from Eric Cantona and Mark Hughes were the sideshow to a magnificent hat-trick from Andrei Kanchelskis.

Job done and the Ukrainian couldn’t contain his delight…

Mark Hughes was also happy with the way things unfolded…

But spare a thought for poor City ‘keeper, Simon Tracey…

Man City 3-1 Man United, 9 November 2002

The beautiful thing about derbies is the way that years of pain can be eradicated in one euphoric 90-minute spell.

And so it proved here.

In the final Premiership Manchester derby to be played at Maine Road it was City who finally had the chance to celebrate getting one over their arch-rivals.

Nicolas Anelka got the ball rolling after just five minutes, capitalising on a Fabian Barthez fumble (don’t act surprised).

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer restored parity just three minutes later but it was a brace from Shaun Goater that settled it.

The first of the Goat’s strikes was particularly sweet for home fans, given the fact that Gary Neville’s unfortunate backpass played a big hand in it.

And Mr. Goater wasn’t about to let GNev forget about his lapse in a hurry…

*This article is a parody. But fortunately we’ve been treated to plenty more poetry from King Eric Cantona.*

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