10 of the shoddiest Christmas gifts lurking in Premier League club catalogues


Christmas is a time for goodwill to all human kind, but said goodwill could be in short supply if you happen to be the highly unfortunate recipient of one of these 10 gifts, plucked from Premier League club catalogues.

In no particular order of shame, it’s advisable to think a little more than twice about giving any of this tattle to your nearest and dearest, even if they are a raving mad footy fan….

The Liverpool onesie

The one-time preserve of the infant is now common place in adult wardrobes, but even the sofa would be ashamed if the occupant of this startling gaudy onesie was lounging on it to catch the Reds on Boxing Day…

Liverpool Onesie

The West Ham snowflake Christmas Tree decoration

Even at £2 a pop, receiving these garish tree decorations the day after you ought to have decorated the thing renders them a little pointless…

West Ham Snowflake

The Chelsea highlighter pens

“Oh thanks very much, umm, I really needed some new highlighter pens?!”Chelsea-Highlighters


The Everton jumper

From a plethora of shocking Christmas Jumpers being pedalled by every club, the fact that this one stood out is testament to its awfulnessEverton-Jumper

The Manchester United ‘mouse’

This cute and cuddly gift for the young Red Devil in the family might be alright, if it looked more like its rodent description rather than a cross between a bear and puppyMan-United-Mouse

The Newcastle snowglobe

Toon mantle pieces adorned with this snowglobe will probably be a rare sight on the big day, even reduced to half priceNewcastle-Globe

The Arsenal Christmas Sack

Does anyone other than Santa Claus himself need a Christmas sack?Arsenal Sack

The Tottenham beach towel

You have to give the Spurs’ commercial department credit for attempting to flog a beach towel in the middle of winter, or any time of year judging by the design

Spurs-TowelThe Villa wallet

Any well-meaning wife, fiancée or girlfriend thinking their Villa-mad fella’s shabby looking wallet needs an upgrade should look elsewhere

Aston Villa Wallet

The Manchester City chef hat

What self-respecting chef would wear this?



Christian Crowther

Give Christian a sport with anything remotely spherical in it and he’ll happily while away the hours watching it on the box. However, he’d much prefer writing about, playing or betting on golf, football, cricket, tennis, snooker.... you get the picture.