It’s here. The final day of the big-spending bonanza! Jim White’s Christmas! Andy Carroll costing £35m anniversary! Whatever you choose to call it, Transfer Deadline Day is back, and here’s our jovial glance at the day ahead.
So, here’s what we’re excited to see from what promises to be another action-packed day of big bids and surprise moves…
Absolutely everyone to leave Arsenal
Kieran Gibbs has gone. Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain is off to Liverpool. Alexis Sanchez is heading for the exit. Inter Milan are closing in on Shkodran Mustafi.
That could well cause a domino effect which leads to Mesut Ozil walking out, Arsene Wenger handing in his notice, Ivan Gazidis selling up and the Emirates Stadium tea lady making a shock switch to Stamford Bridge.
Spurious Twitter rumours
Your mate Kev apparently just spotted Granit Xhaka buying bath mats in Swindon. Someone who looks a bit like Lionel Messi was at Greggs in Burnley. That lad you used to work with claims he has it on good authority that Ander Herrera is going to sign a loan deal with Bury any minute now.
And knowing the madness of Deadline Day, at least one of them will probably be right…
The Jim White show
Nobody, not even us, loves Transfer Deadline Day quite like the Sky Sports News presenter. The mere mention of Norwich City signing a 20-year-old left-back makes him giddy with joy, so we can’t wait to see how he reacts to some of the blockbuster moves we’ll see completed today.
Oh, and of course, it means another outing for the iconic yellow tea.
Peter Odemwingie…coming soon to a ground near you
We’ve all done awkward things in life, but turning up at Loftus Road in an attempt to join Queens Park Rangers, only to be told the club don’t want you…well, that’s on a whole other level.
Despite hitting double figures in two Premier League seasons and featuring at a pair of World Cups for Nigeria, the 36-year-old remains most famous for arriving at a club he never ended up playing for.
They say lightning never strikes twice, but we wouldn’t put it past the nomadic striker to turn up at a Championship club tonight, clutching a copy of his CV.
Harry’s car window interview
It’s not Deadline Day if Harry Redknapp isn’t leaning out of his motor to talk about how a rival club’s striker is a “top, top, top player”. We’re pretty certain he’ll be up to his old tricks once again, possibly capped off by a televised plea for Niko Kranjcar to rejoin him at St Andrew’s.
All Odds and Markets are correct as of the date of publishing